Thanks Quincy Jones....

...for your daughter, Rashida Leah Jones.


Hope you didn't think this was gonna be another post MJ "Thriller" post? Nah son, I keeps it fresh.

Yes, contrary to popular belief, the best thing Quincy put out in the 70s was not "Off The Wall" but rather this beautiful product of his loins (pause).

On top of being ridiculous good looking, she is also a Harvard Alum! Beauty, brains and funny too! Who could resist?

Looks like she only digs white guys however :/

Cartoon Network - f*** is you doin yo?

So apparently Cartoon Network has decided to begin a segment on Wednesdays where they show live action shows.

The f***?

Exactly. What happened to the days when you would know what to expect from a channel from it's name? Watching Music Television, I could expect to actually hear some music instead of watching someone's mom pick who he or she should date. A change to American Movie Classics and expect the movie on it not to suck. I could even watch Black Entertainment Television and expect to be entertained, not ashamed of my race. Now they are taking my cartoons?

F***!

Not like there aren't hundreds of channels showing real people every hour of every day. Why change the one top draw for your channel? Why would this change attract viewers?

Now every Wednesday I'll be able to watch a trivia game show that takes place on a rollercoaster. No, really...

F*** my life...

Slamball - Why Didn't I Think of That?

Slamball might be the most genius sport created in the past few years. There is no doubt why it is now shown on television. The idea of it is so brilliant, I'm surprised that it wasn't thought of sooner. Take a sport (basketball), take the most exciting aspect of it (dunking on niggas), subtract the extras (plays and s**t), add trampolines and Voila! Slamball. It just feels right.



"Slamball is the creation of Mason Gordon, who wanted to create a combination of sports that approximated a real-life video game." Yes that is a direct quote. The first television appearance was in 2002 on the not yet named Spike TV after a partnership with former 76ers GM Pat Croce (I wish I was making this up). There was even a draft! Apparently there are rules an s**t but who really cares. The main difference is dunks are worth 3 points, apparently to promote niggas dunking on niggas.

Since "The Man Show" has shown pretty much anything is better with the addition of trampolines, what other sports could benefit from the addition of a trampoline?

TV Commentary

I felt like I needed to write something because I'm OD bored right now and have woefully neglected this here blog. The problem is I really have nothing to talk about. With that said, I think I'll just comment on the goings on of cable television.

Channel: FX
Spider-Man 2

The part where Mary Jane is about to get married to some random dude, but instead shows up at Peter Parker's crib is crazy. First off, let me preface what I'm about to say by mentioning that I think domestic abuse. Anyway, dude is chilling at the altar and this heifer Mary Jane never shows up. How are you gonna wait until the day of the wedding to decide you wanna stick with bum @$$ Peter Parker? If I ever saw her in the streets, she would catch a backhand off top. Weddings are expensive!

On another note, Mary Jane is a jump anyway. She messed with Pete and Harry. Whatever happened to "Bros before Hos"? If they would have never broken rule #1 of bromance (pause) then they never would have fought and Harry's face wouldn't require extensive plastic surgery, word to MJ (RIP).

X-Men 3

Magneto is the dude for a few reasons.

1). He can control metal and magnetic fields and what not. If he's watching TV, he doesn't even have to get up to change the remote. Dude is so powerful, if he wanted to he could eff up the Earth's magnetic field. BAWSE! (c)Officer Ricky

2). He rocks a sweet cloak. A draping cloak is the perfect wardrobe choice for a villain. When walking it seems to have a mind of its own as it flows in the wind behind you.

3). Militancy. Magneto is the Malcolm X to Professor X's Martin Luther King Jr. His approach is very "By Any Means Necessary"-esque. But instead of an AK by the window, he has powers an s**t.

More to come...

Neglect...

I have neglected you blog. I'm sorry. I really have nothing to talk about right now. So um, I'll get back to you...

Eff Lebron

Good job Orlando Magic.



Take that Lebron dick riders!

Cinco de Mayo!!!

Cinco de Mayo aka "A Reason To Drink" Day is upon us. But what exactly is it's purpose minus a reason to get drunk? I initially thought that it was in celebration of Mexico's Independence from Spain, but upon doing some research, it is vastly more insignificant than that, but still a noteworthy day in the history of Mexico.

Cinco de Mayo is of course May 5th (duh). On this date back in 1862, a ragtag group of Mexican army soldiers were able to repel French forces in the not as much heralded Battle of Puebla. These troops, under General Ignacio Zaragoza Seguin, were able to defeat a group of French soldiers greatly superior in number and equipment. Yes, as we see here, the French fail once again, a theme that will be repeated time after time in history.


Interestingly enough, Cinco de Mayo is popular more in United States than in Mexico. Yet another example of American habitual swagger jacking (see: St. Patrick's Day). Mexico's actual independence day is September 16th. Who knew? (I did. Thanks Wikipedia!)

So what it appears to be is that the makers of Corona and Tequila have adopted the holiday into an excuse to drink several Coronas and shots of Tequila. I have no problem with that, as I love to drink Coronas and take shots of Tequila. It can't be just coincidence that Coronas were on sale last week. As we see here, this "holiday" is simply another device to drive up the sale of alcoholic beverages. So in light of Cinco de Mayo, have one (several) of these...